#54: Guilt! Let it Serve You or Let it GO.

We think about guilt in a couple of backwards ways.

Either we feel it ALL the time, and think we "should" / deserve to...

Or we think we're WRONG for feeling it at all, because we "should know better" and this is a silly habit to have as a grown adult. 

I vote NO to both options.

You do not owe it to the universe (or yourself) to feel guilty 1900 times a day. You simply aren't stealing and murdering enough to warrant that amount of remorse!

NOR should you be able to turn this emotion off like a lightswitch, simply because you're able to "rationally" see that it doesn't make sense in a given scenario. (If only humaning were that straightforward, no?)

But humaning is messy. And guilt is an emotion you're going to feel. So let's get intentional about it!

In this episode, I break down the steps we work through in Coaching to rework how GUILT works in your life:

1. Decide WHY you want guilt in your life. What function do you want it to play? What's its job description? 
2. Decide HOW you want guilt to function in your life. My suggestion? Make this a one-time-use emotion. Rather than hang on to it & recycle it for the rest of eternity — let it show up when it needs to, feel it fully (yuck, I know), but then move on. Knowing you're in alignment with who you want to be. Knowing that continuing to guilt-trip yourself won't be useful, because there's no new information in that recycled feeling for you!
3. Decide where you DON'T need guilt anymore. Look at where it's showing up right now in your life, and where (per Step #1!) it doesn't need to. 

Remember it's a process that requires practice to change this habit. But if it means feeling 90% LESS guilt for the rest of your life, and making WAY more authentic, aligned decisions... worth it!

More links!

• Download the Free Crash Course: How to Say NO to a Request or Invite (without being a terrible person, ruining a relationship, or ending up doing it anyway!) 
• Book your free consult to talk about working together